Crisis and Adversity

Navigating the Narrow Gate (Tom Cole – 4/29/22 – NCS New Canaan)

April 29, 2022 by NCS New Canaan Leave a Comment

With amazing wisdom and humility gained on life’s journey, Tom Cole shares the ups and downs that have allowed God to shape him, as well as the role the New Canaan Society and the friendships he has found in NCS brudders have played in his story. He reveals with tremendous vulnerability how his greatest personal growth came through the hardest moments of life.

From a painful and public divorce to two heart attacks, Tom talks about the importance of his faith in Jesus to his ability to weather difficult storms. He explains how the first heart attack ultimately led to his book “The Narrow Gate: Fatherly Advice for Navigating the Pathway to Your Best Life“. Lying on a hospital gurney not knowing if he was going home to Jesus, Tom shares that the “dominant” thought was he had not poured enough wisdom into his kids.

Tom takes us through a few of the chapters, starting with what he has learned about the source of real joy and happiness–deep relationship with God and others. He explains why money and achievement do not bring happiness.

He also explains the importance of sharing our stories–not only so that others can walk with us through them, but so that we can make a connection with those who need us to walk with them through their stories.

He ties it all back to the core of NCS–growing deeper in friendship with Jesus and friendship with others by “showing up”–“showing up” not for what you can get but because you might be able to impact the life of another man. Tom transparently tells stories of how he has “shown up” for others and how others have “shown up” and walked with him through life’s valleys.

Newly retired from a long and successful career in investment banking, Tom describes navigating the transition to a new season of life. He also explains the importance of being present to the moment, living one day at a time, even as we reflect on the past and plan for the future.

This is God-inspired wisdom for leading a life walking in the Way of Jesus–wisdom from a father to his children, from a brother to his brothers, and from a friend to his friends.

If any man truly wants to be an NCS brudder, he needs to listen to this God-inspired wisdom on what we mean by “showing up”.

Early in his talk, Tom refers to “a message from our sponsor”. He showed a video produced by Chick-fil-A as an employee training tool. You can watch it below.

Finding Rest for Your Soul (Andrew Palau – 3/18/22 – NCS New Canaan)

March 19, 2022 by NCS New Canaan Leave a Comment

Like a conversation between old friends, Andrew Palau shares his faith journey with remarkable honesty and humility. In fact, it is a conversation between old friends–the Palau family and the New Canaan Society have had a special relationship for over 20 years.

Andrew shares exciting news about the Palau CityFest coming to Southwest Connecticut in 2022 (www.cityfest.org).

He tells about his “wayward” days (as described in his book “The Secret Life of a Fool”) and how his parents never gave up on him. Andrew describes his father’s heartfelt letters and talks and the prayers that came from around the world.

He describes the tortured, sleepless nights wrestling with shame and the direction of his life. He also shares about the trip to Kingston, Jamaica that changed everything–the trip when he met Jesus and Wendy, who became his wife.

Andrew also talks about his father and his legacy and what it has been like to be called to continue that legacy. Those who knew Luis will recognize his uniquely disarming honesty and humility in Andrew.

Finally, Andrew offers a way for us to “find rest for our souls” as he finally did in Jamaica.

The Youth Drug Crisis (and the Power of Jesus and Friends) (Panel – 1/21/22 – NCS New Canaan)

January 21, 2022 by NCS New Canaan Leave a Comment

The drug and opioid crisis is ravaging America’s youth. With amazing courage and vulnerability, a panel of NCS brudders share how drug addiction has personally hit them and their family. More importantly, they describe how their faith in Jesus and the prayers and support of friends, particularly NCS brudders, were powerful allies in each of their spiritual battles against darkness and evil.

In the face of societal stigma around addiction, the panelists emphasized the importance, particularly for parents, of admitting the addiction problem and seeking help. They also strongly encouraged family members of addicts to seek their own support.

Doran Wright (NCS New Canaan) shares about the battle he and his wife fought alongside their son Josh, who tragically died of a Fentanyl overdose in 2020. A photo montage of Josh can be seen below.

James Lillis (NCS New Haven) shares about his own uncontrollable addiction and how he was completely and miraculously freed at Teen Challenge after turning his life over to Jesus.

Armen Abrahamian (NCS New Haven) shares with amazing transparency and specificity the long journey he and his wife have been on with their daughter, who thankfully has now been sober for the last few years.

Before the panel share their stories, retired NYS Trooper Greg Porteus (NCS New Canaan) describes a program he is launching to raise awareness about the opioid crisis and equip parents and children to be prepared in advance with “a way out”. He invites all NCS brudders to “Join the Patrol”.

Following the panelists, Rev. Richard Williams (NCS New Canaan), Executive Director of Pivot Ministries (www.pivotministries.org), shares a bit of his own story of addiction and explains the Pivot recovery program available in Bridgeport, CT.

Following Jesus (One Less Sin at a Time) (David Montoya – 10/22/21 – NCS New Canaan)

November 2, 2021 by NCS New Canaan 1 Comment

With unbelievable honesty and humility, David Montoya shares a life and faith journey that brings to life the promise in Ezekiel 36:26: “And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.”

David vulnerably shares difficult and pivotal moments of his early years, including the time his fiancé died in his arms on the way to the hospital–events that he says changed the course of his life. At that time, a therapist told David he had the greatest fear of death the therapist had ever seen.

With tremendous transparency, Montoya tells about his later years as a lawyer and a venture capitalist, describing himself as “evil”–having no regard to the carnage left behind on the road to “winning”. He explains how that heart of stone began to transform when a friend invited him to a New Canaan Society event in San Francisco.

While David’s heart transformation has been ongoing since he first began attending NCS in 2015, David reveals a recent and extraordinary near-death experience that had a profound impact on his fear of death–he says it is gone.

Think About Noble Things (Kevin Mackay – 10/8/21 – NCS New Canaan)

October 8, 2021 by NCS New Canaan Leave a Comment

Kevin Mackay served as a Corporal in the U.S. Marine Corps and for 17 years as a Stamford Police officer. With tremendous humility and vulnerability, he shares about the “moral injury” he experienced and the miraculous healing that came through his new-found faith in Jesus.

Kevin explains that the most debilitating “moral injury” came when he was a computer forensic expert with the Stamford Police investigating cases of child pornography. With amazing transparency, he reveals how having to examine unspeakable images and incomprehensible search terms drove him to a mental break. Although he began self-medicating, Kevin shares how he turned to the Stamford Police Chaplain for support. Kevin explains that he was an atheist not interested in hearing about God or Jesus, but he believed he could trust the Chaplain (NCS brudder John Revell of Life Line Chaplaincy) to listen confidentially.

Mackay explains how Revell shared with him Philippians 4, particularly verse 4:8: “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” He describes how shifting his mind to the “noble” took his focus off the images of evil he had experienced. It also led Kevin to begin exploring the idea of God in various faiths. Ultimately, applying his analytical mind to Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis and The Case for Christ by Lee Strobel, Mackay knew that what was missing from his life was Jesus Christ.

Although a reluctant convert just like C.S. Lewis, Kevin goes on to share how his new-found faith has both healed him and given him a new perspective on life. It has transformed him from someone always trying to control his circumstances to someone able to look through circumstances and see the hand of a loving God with a wonderful plan. He tells how anxiety and anxiety drugs have been replaced by the healing peace promised in Philippians.

Philippians 4:6-7: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

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