Health Challenges and Losses

A Tale of Tragedy, Triumph and Changed Lives

January 22, 2023 by NCS New Canaan Leave a Comment

Tom Mallon humbly shares the incredible journey that took him from growing up in southern Ohio (a la “Hillbilly Elegy”) as one of seven children with nine people living in a three-bedroom, one-bathroom home to building and selling his company in an innovative way that changed the lives of his employees.

Tom describes a turning point in his faith when he asked God what it meant to be “saved”, and God vividly revealed situations in which He had provided for Tom supernaturally. From that revelation, he knew God loved him and that he was “saved”.

Tom recounts his career path from working in the local glass factory, to selling books door-to-door for seven summers (including as a Harvard Business School graduate without a job), to 11 years in commercial real estate, to watching his first business venture fail due to a bad partnership, to starting the business that he would eventually build, sell to an ESOP and then sell to a Catholic health system, resulting in the lives of his employees being profoundly changed (13 employees becoming millionaires, 3 more receiving $900,000 and even the lowest-paid employees walking away with $400-500,000).

Tom vulnerably shares how God used a triple-tragedy (death of his first business dream, death of his father, and a health challenge) to “roto-rooter” his soul in preparation for his second business venture.

He describes the growth of his second venture and the drawn-out sale process that took the business through two letters of intent before the Holy Spirit convicted him to pursue an ESOP sale by asking “what is the best business decision you can make for your company’s future that will increase the ministry and mission of the business?” Tom also shares how the faithful culture of the business grew after the ESOP sale.

Finally, Tom explains the lessons he learned about the importance of “aligned capital” and how those lessons led to the formation of his current venture, Perpetuate Capital.

Adventures of a Urogynecologist (Dr. Bob Lobel – 1/6/23 – NCS New Canaan)

January 22, 2023 by NCS New Canaan Leave a Comment

With incredible courage, humility and vulnerability, Dr. Bob Lobel shares the challenges and pain that can come from “family of origin” problems–in his case never feeling he could meet his father’s expectations.

Bob explains that, despite being seen by others as a hugely successful and confident surgeon, those childhood feelings manifested as intense “shame” that has impacted his marriage, relationships, career and life. He describes it as a “chronic illness” that requires daily “medication”.

Despite growing up in a home devoid of religion or God, Bob talks about the deep faith that has helped him survive horrific tragedies, including the loss of a child to SIDs and his first wife to cancer.

As the founder of the NCS Albany chapter, Bob shares the profound impact NCS has had in his life: his first NCS experience was a Retreat at Mohonk Mountain House, an NCS Retreat at Hershey opened the door to understanding his shame, and an NCS Retreat at the Homestead helped his family heal from the loss of his first wife.

This is an NCS brudder truly taking off his mask in the hope that revealing his pain may help others begin to face and heal from theirs.

Holy Spirit Nudges (Edward Mahoney – 5/13/22 – NCS New Canaan)

May 13, 2022 by NCS New Canaan Leave a Comment

Edward Mahoney humbly shares the amazing story of how God transformed him from being “Wall Street Centered” to “Jesus Centered” and how he came to understand and boldly respond to “nudges” from the Holy Spirit.

Mahoney transparently tells the story of spending two years in a hospital as a child during which he received last rites twice. He also explains how that experience began to unlock his gift of relating to people.

Ed talks about his successful Wall Street career and then vulnerably reveals the personal toll of falling from the top. He explains the two events that began the transformation from “Wall Street Centered” to “Jesus Centered”, one of which was showing up for the first time at the New Canaan Society. Ed also shares the importance of his NCS Energy Group that has been “showing up” for each other for over 10 years.

In his words, our gifts and talents are gifts from God to be used to bless others for God’s glory. “Nudges” are when we sense we are meant to do something for someone else–those sometimes uncomfortable opportunities to love our neighbor.

Sharing a few anecdotes from his book Tales from the Bright Side: The Holy Spirit Adventures of Edward Peter Mahoney, Ed tells the incredible story of how he came to write a book about his “Holy Spirit” experiences following “nudges” and emphasizes that his book was written as an encouragement and a challenge to all of us to boldly step out when the Holy Spirit nudges.

Finally, Ed shows a “nudge” in action. He explains that as he was walking through the door and greeted one of the staff in the restaurant, he sensed that he was meant to give all the proceeds from book sales that morning to the restaurant staff serving the group. And he does.

Navigating the Narrow Gate (Tom Cole – 4/29/22 – NCS New Canaan)

April 29, 2022 by NCS New Canaan Leave a Comment

With amazing wisdom and humility gained on life’s journey, Tom Cole shares the ups and downs that have allowed God to shape him, as well as the role the New Canaan Society and the friendships he has found in NCS brudders have played in his story. He reveals with tremendous vulnerability how his greatest personal growth came through the hardest moments of life.

From a painful and public divorce to two heart attacks, Tom talks about the importance of his faith in Jesus to his ability to weather difficult storms. He explains how the first heart attack ultimately led to his book “The Narrow Gate: Fatherly Advice for Navigating the Pathway to Your Best Life“. Lying on a hospital gurney not knowing if he was going home to Jesus, Tom shares that the “dominant” thought was he had not poured enough wisdom into his kids.

Tom takes us through a few of the chapters, starting with what he has learned about the source of real joy and happiness–deep relationship with God and others. He explains why money and achievement do not bring happiness.

He also explains the importance of sharing our stories–not only so that others can walk with us through them, but so that we can make a connection with those who need us to walk with them through their stories.

He ties it all back to the core of NCS–growing deeper in friendship with Jesus and friendship with others by “showing up”–“showing up” not for what you can get but because you might be able to impact the life of another man. Tom transparently tells stories of how he has “shown up” for others and how others have “shown up” and walked with him through life’s valleys.

Newly retired from a long and successful career in investment banking, Tom describes navigating the transition to a new season of life. He also explains the importance of being present to the moment, living one day at a time, even as we reflect on the past and plan for the future.

This is God-inspired wisdom for leading a life walking in the Way of Jesus–wisdom from a father to his children, from a brother to his brothers, and from a friend to his friends.

If any man truly wants to be an NCS brudder, he needs to listen to this God-inspired wisdom on what we mean by “showing up”.

Early in his talk, Tom refers to “a message from our sponsor”. He showed a video produced by Chick-fil-A as an employee training tool. You can watch it below.

Think About Noble Things (Kevin Mackay – 10/8/21 – NCS New Canaan)

October 8, 2021 by NCS New Canaan Leave a Comment

Kevin Mackay served as a Corporal in the U.S. Marine Corps and for 17 years as a Stamford Police officer. With tremendous humility and vulnerability, he shares about the “moral injury” he experienced and the miraculous healing that came through his new-found faith in Jesus.

Kevin explains that the most debilitating “moral injury” came when he was a computer forensic expert with the Stamford Police investigating cases of child pornography. With amazing transparency, he reveals how having to examine unspeakable images and incomprehensible search terms drove him to a mental break. Although he began self-medicating, Kevin shares how he turned to the Stamford Police Chaplain for support. Kevin explains that he was an atheist not interested in hearing about God or Jesus, but he believed he could trust the Chaplain (NCS brudder John Revell of Life Line Chaplaincy) to listen confidentially.

Mackay explains how Revell shared with him Philippians 4, particularly verse 4:8: “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” He describes how shifting his mind to the “noble” took his focus off the images of evil he had experienced. It also led Kevin to begin exploring the idea of God in various faiths. Ultimately, applying his analytical mind to Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis and The Case for Christ by Lee Strobel, Mackay knew that what was missing from his life was Jesus Christ.

Although a reluctant convert just like C.S. Lewis, Kevin goes on to share how his new-found faith has both healed him and given him a new perspective on life. It has transformed him from someone always trying to control his circumstances to someone able to look through circumstances and see the hand of a loving God with a wonderful plan. He tells how anxiety and anxiety drugs have been replaced by the healing peace promised in Philippians.

Philippians 4:6-7: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

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